Unlocking Your Authentic Self: A Deep Dive into Your Core Personal Values
Personal Core Values:
Have you ever wondered what truly drives your decisions, shapes your priorities, and defines who you are? The answer often lies in your personal values. Far more than just fleeting preferences, values are the fundamental beliefs that you cherish most in life. They act as an internal compass, guiding your choices, influencing your goals, and ultimately, defining your identity.
While everyone's values are unique and there's no "correct" set, understanding them is a powerful step towards recognizing what truly matters to you and prioritizing your future.
When thinking of Core Values we need to remember that we have to identify what is important to us! Not what is important to others!!
What Shapes Our Values?
Our personal values are not formed in a vacuum; they are a rich tapestry woven from various influences throughout our lives:
Our own beliefs.
Family and the values we learn from them.
Friends and the shared values that build close connections.
Society and the norms and expectations it presents.
Unique life experiences that cause values to change or become more prominent over time.
This means your values as a teenager might differ significantly from those you hold as a parent, reflecting the evolution brought by life's journey.
Discovering Your Core Values
So, how do you uncover these deeply held beliefs?
Working with your therapist or on your own: Go through a list of values that you may hold. A key rule is to select no more than 10 values you identify as important. Rank these top 1 to 10, 1 being the values you hold most important to YOU. A great list to use is MI values card sort.
Try these Values Discussion Questions to assist with Self-Exploration: These prompts can encourage a deeper reflection across various life aspects of our lives.
People you admire and their traits/values.
How your ideal day compares to a typical day, and which activities reflect your values.
Values you share with close friends.
What hypothetical scenarios, like - a large fortune or your dream job, reveal about your priorities.
How your values have changed over time due to life experiences.
The significance of your most prized possessions.
How your frequent thoughts, wishes, or reactions to others' behaviors reflect your values.
How different people in your life (family, friends, co-workers) might perceive your values.
Detailed exploration of specific life domains such as family relationships, marriage, parenting, friendships, work, recreation, spirituality, community, and physical health. For each, you can describe ideal scenarios, desired contributions, and areas for improvement.
Living by Your Values: From Belief to Action
Once you've clarified your values, the next step is to align your actions with them. This is crucial because our actions don't always perfectly align with our held values, often due to competing priorities or inherent difficulties in living up to certain ideals. (Ideals are NOT values, they are something we would like, but we are not putting in the work or behaviors to achieve it - Values will align with our behaviors).
Ex. Ideal - I would like to be more active. I am not doing any behaviors to be more active. My behaviors do not align with being more active.
Ex. Values - I would like to be more active. I am going for walks, hikes, going to the gym, taking the stairs at work. My behaviors align w/ my values~
What does it Mean to live a life true to your values:
Identify areas for focus: Determine which values you want to prioritize in the future.
Commit to life changes: Be prepared to make necessary changes to accomplish this alignment.
Invest time and effort: Assess if you're contributing enough time and energy to the areas of your life that reflect your values, such as family, relationships, career, and personal well-being. If not, identify how you'd like to improve in those areas.
This dedication to your values helps you express your most authentic self.
The Link to Well-being and Self-Esteem
Living in alignment with your values contributes significantly to your overall well-being!
Embrace Your Values Journey
Discovering and living by your values is a continuous journey of self-exploration and growth. By consciously reflecting on what matters most to you, understanding its influences, and actively aligning your choices with your core beliefs, you pave the way for a more authentic, fulfilling, and well-rounded life. So, take the time to explore your values – it's an investment in your most authentic self.
Supporting individuals in examining their values is a crucial aspect of my work. Understanding one's values can help clients identify instances where they may be compromising themselves or living inauthentically. This can occur due to prioritizing others' needs, lacking healthy boundaries, or struggling to prioritize their own well-being because of family or cultural pressures. By quieting external influences, we can focus on the work necessary to create the life we truly envision for ourselves.
Take the Next Step Towards understanding your core values and prioritizing your mental wellness.
Consider scheduling a virtual therapy session tailored to your needs. Together, we can work towards your personal goals in a supportive and affirming environment.
Meet Christine McGowan: Your Partner in Mental Wellness
With years of experience in the mental health field, I specialize in trauma recovery, neurodiversity, and empowering individuals to navigate life's transitions. My approach is rooted in empathy and evidence-based practices, ensuring that you receive the support you need to achieve your personal goals. Together, we can explore your unique journey and foster a deeper understanding of your mental health. Learn more about my approach.